


one final love, one final time

by Annette56



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bittersweet Ending, Canon Compliant, Canon Disabled Character, Deaf Character, F/M, Family Feels, Fluff and Angst, Sam Winchester's Son, Sam Winchester-centric, Season/Series 15, Season/Series 15 Spoilers, This is my catharsis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:02:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27640421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annette56/pseuds/Annette56
Summary: Dean Jr. Winchester Leahy was born on November 19, 2021. He weights seven pounds and comes into this world screaming. A natural born fighter says the doctor amused at the fit the new born throws. His face is as red as a tomato and he has his mother’s eyes.He’s the love of Sam’s life.| or an exploration of sam's life as he grows old and raises his sonalso eileen is his wife
Relationships: Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester
Comments: 5
Kudos: 25





	one final love, one final time

Eileen finds him exactly one week after Dean dies. She comes crashing down to save his ass one more time in the middle of his latest hunt. She explains she had gone to the bunker and after finding it empty, had to track him down for two states till she found him. 

He doesn’t ask how, he doesn’t ask why. She takes one look at his emaciated being, heart full of sorrow and face of pure disbelief, and pulls him down for a hug. 

He asks instead if she will marry him.

She signs yes.

**. . .**

Dean Jr. Winchester Leahy was born on November 19, 2021. He weights seven pounds and comes into this world screaming. A natural born fighter says the doctor amused at the fit the new born throws. His face is as red as a tomato and he has his mother’s eyes.

He’s the love of Sam’s life.

Sam can’t believe how much he loves this baby. This tiny being wrapped in what are probably too many blankets. The love between him and Eileen made flesh, a perfect mixture of them both. He thinks Dean would have spoiled him rotten. Would’ve had teached him all kinds of bad things in his adolescence that would have driven Sam mad. And his eyes would have shone so bright, full of pride at the mention of his nephew. 

He swallows what feels like a hundred knives and hugs the baby closer to his heart. And looking into his eyes, Eileen’s eyes, he feels the ache in his heart soften a little. 

**. . .**

He had always dreamed of being a father. He had. Over 15 years ago his plans involved being made partner at a prestigious law firm and a blonde girl that made living feel like dreaming. Instead he still has to put salt on his windows, he checks the devil’s trap on the door every night, but he also gets to carry his son on his shoulders as he and his wife go into their garden for a family picnic. 

Life doesn’t always go as one plans it. Sam finds he can cope with its changes, especially when _he_ is the one making them. 

  
  


**. . .**

He sings _hey jude_ to their son every night as he lays him down to sleep. Eileen complains the Beatles are too overrated and old. Sam chuckles and agrees, but says this one song is an exception...a family lullaby you could call it. Eileen’s eyes soften and she understands. 

Sam catches her one day signing the song to their son who stares back at her enchanted. Sam’s cheeks feel warm as the tears fall down. 

  
  


**. . .**

  
  


Dean’s first word is _mom_. He babbles it while touching his chin repeatedly with his thumb to catch her attention, and Sam couldn’t be more proud at how smart his little guy is. Eileen cries that night in Sam’s arms. He rubs his back and kisses her forehead and just is there with her as she lets it all out.

Before falling asleep a teary Eileen says _that’s my boy._

**. . .**

Sam on the other hand cries about what feels like every week...every day. He has special occasions, certain days...dates that will render him to a pile of pain and sadness for hours. Eileen has a gift to know when he needs to be left alone, and when he needs her there to be reminded of why he’s still fighting. The two first January 24 he spent sobbing while clutching at pictures and drinking a beer to his brother’s memory, not enough to get drunk, he promised he wouldn’t be that kind of father. 

On the third January 24 he takes his son on a ride on the Impala. They go to a beach, and quietly fish all day. They watch the sunset, and stay for a few hours under the stars. 

Very carefully he lays Dean on the co-pilot seat and puts his flannel shirt over him as a blanket. He thinks his brother is probably smiling at the image it makes from wherever he is still watching over him. It certainly makes him smile. 

From that day on he decides to celebrate his brother’s memory as he would’ve liked. Sometimes he eats some pies, stomach full of nostalgia and melancholy. Sometimes he goes fishing. Sometimes, he just lies under the stars and stares at them for hours, feeling Dean’s light in all of them. 

**. . .**

Dean takes his first steps. He takes them towards Sam’s big smile and kind eyes. He gets a round of applause from all the adults in the room there to celebrate his birthday. Sam and Castiel, Garth’s twins, a full year and a half older than him, come running along a little too fast and jump around their friend excitedly. Bess warns them not to be too rough on little Dean, who is only human, but can’t hide her amusement and sighs with fondness when the twins try to teach Dean how to run. 

**. . .**

Sam and Eileen stand side to side as they watch their little boy go inside for his first day of school. The day before Sam had an hour long phone call to Jody on how to deal with the separation anxiety, what if Dean couldn’t make friends, or stood out too much, what if he missed them too much, or needed them and-

 _Sam,_ he could feel Jody’s smile on the other side of the phone, _he will be fine. You, will be fine. _

He comes back from his first day of school with 10 new best friends and a girlfriend. He can feel Dean’s smile too from Heaven. _That’s my boy._

  
  


**. . .**

Some days are better than others. Some nights he gets out for a long drive with no direction and no apparent destination. He just drives around, listening to the songs that he has heard his whole life, the car that makes his childhood home his only company. He misses Dean. He misses him like a part of him is gone. Like there’s a giant hole on his chest. Like his soul had been taken away again. 

He drives back home and gets into his bed, into Eileen’s patient arms and drowns in her love until he can’t feel anything else but her. 

He wakes up to his son's scared eyes asking if he can sleep in their bed too, he had a bad dream. Sam picks him up like he weighs nothing and places him upon where his and Eileen’s sides touch. He wraps the blanket over him and then his arm too, hugging his family tight and going back to sleep. 

  
  
  


**. . .**

His son asks for a new story every night, even as he grows into a moody teenager he’s still fascinated by the lives of his parents. Their old battles, their old scars, the good and the bad. The people they’ve lost. He’s as gentle as his father and tries to carry on the memory of people he has never met.

He finds some stories hilarious, and asks to be told more than once; mostly involving Dean or Cass, or uncle Garth. One of his favorites is the time he had to baby sit a shape-shifting baby.

He listens fondly at the ones where Sam got to meet his mom and dad again, and asks afterwards if he can have a picture of his grandparents in his room.

Sam thinks he could give him the world if he asked for it too.  
  
  


**. . .**

Eileen passes away before he does, and his heart cracks one more time into a million pieces. He’s old and tired, and knows his time is about to end soon too. He tries not to seem to forward to reunite with his loved ones in heaven, if that’s where he’s going, if he’s somehow, in some way, worthy of it.

He spends all his remaining days surrounded by his family, and hopes once he goes he doesn’t see them again until a very, very long time.

**. . .**

  
  


His son comes to bid him goodbye, one final time. Sam had already said goodbye to the others, Claire and Kaya, and their daughter, Alex, Patience, Garth and his never-ending offspring, Charlie and his son, Frodo.

And of course his own grandchildren, Rosemary and Bobby John.

Little Rosie was only 4 and would probably forget this memory, his memory as she grows old, but she still looked incredibly sad hugging him one last time. Johnny wasn’t even six months old, a patch of blond hair barely on his head, but Sam was eternally grateful he even got to meet him, and watch his tiny hand wrap around his finger one last time. 

Dean is with him in his final moments. He looks almost angelic as he comes to release him from these earthly bounds and bid him farewell. Sam’s heart is still full of love for him and pride pours out of his eyes as he looks at him all grown up. He clutches tight into his son’s hand, looks into his eyes, _her eyes_ and goes to sleep, one final time.

**Author's Note:**

> this was written literally on the aftermath of the show's ending so its rushed and emotional and it feels cathartic as hell. never in my wildest dreams i thought sam would get to grow old, have a son!!!! and die at old age, i cried for an hour and then wrote this. 
> 
> also spn is sexist as hell and refused to show the wife but we can all agree that its eileen right? good  
> i tried to be very respectful while writing her but if anything came out as offensive or ignorant please tell me.
> 
> i know dean jr look like 20? something when sam died but honestly sam looked veeery old so im putting dean jr at around 30 something, so ofc he has kids of his own (and i just wanted sam to get to meet his granchildren too...sue me) i chose rosemary bc i wanted a name with mary on it but that could also be shorten to her own self, rose. nd bobby john is such a good name sjdiojsiod someone haddd to take it.  
> (and yall know charlie had to name his son after a fictional character she loved)
> 
> and in case it wasn't obvious, one last love, one final time is in reference to sam still fighting for his family, and still living, one final time, for his final love in life, his son.


End file.
